The following is a transcript of a circle delivered on this subject.
وَلَا تَقْرَبُوا الزِّنَا
“Nor come close to adultery” [TMQ Al-Isra: 32].
Allah (swt) orders us not to come close to Zina (fornication) and people today are calling us to celebrate fornication.
The Prophet (saw) said: “Whoever imitates a people is one of them”.
It's that time of the year again when roses are exchanged, people confess their love and make promises to each other. February 14th, also known as St. Valentine's Day, is the time of year that for centuries has been dedicated to honour love and the pursuit of romance.On this day the postal services is very busy delivering cards and letters, or playing the role of a 'cupid', forwarding messages of 'true love'. Youngsters will be making Valentine's cards, and lots would be collecting money from their pocket money to buy gifts for their so called loved one. Also there a Valentine's Day rituals of sending anonymous cards, chocolates and gifts between secret admirers.
At school girls and boys will compete with each other to see who received the most Valentines cards and boast about the number of secret admirers they have. Others will be hiding their faces with humiliation in the realisation that nobody showed any romantic interest in them. It doesn’t stop there, in some places the Teachers and pupils will be organising the annual Valentines party, which for many youngsters will be their first encouragement to partake in the temptations of the opposite sex.
So what's the harm in all this some may ask? After all, is it not a day to remind your spouse of how much you love them, or for the children to indulge in a bit of fun? Valentine's Day is not simply about showing your affection to your partner or spouse, but it is in fact a day to remove all inhibitions and show your feelings to the person you secretly desire, a colleague, classmate, next door neighbour, relative etc, but someone to whom on any other day of the year it would not be easy to approach.
THE STORY OF ST VALENTINE
During the fifth century the Catholic Church wanted to end a pagan fertility rite that the Romans had practised every year since the 4th century BC. During the month of February a lottery would be held to celebrate a young man's rite of passage to the "god" Lupericus. Young teenage girls participated in this lottery, with their names being placed in a box and drawn at random by young men. Through the lottery these young girls would be assigned to the man who picked them out, in order to enjoy 'mutual pleasure' for the duration of a year until the next year's lottery.
The Church was unhappy with the promiscuous nature of this ritual and tried to end it by selecting a "Lover's Saint", who would be honoured as a replacement of the ritual of Lupericus. They chose a bishop by the name of Valentine who had been executed in the 3rd century AD. His punishment was as a result of his defying the Emperor Claudius who had banned marriages saying that married men made poor soldiers, as they did not want to leave their families during battles. Valentine invited lovers to come to him to be married in secret, a crime for which he was executed. However, before he died he is said to have sent a farewell message to the jailer's daughter with whom he had fallen in love while in prison. It read "From your Valentine."
وَلَنْ تَرْضَى عَنْكَ الْيَهُودُ وَلَا النَّصَارَى حَتَّى تَتَّبِعَ مِلَّتَهُمْ
"Never will the Jews nor the Christians be pleased with you (O Muhammad) till you follow their religion." [Al-Baqarah: 120]
VALENTINE'S DAY-A celebration of promiscuity
The modern day ritual of Valentine's Day has developed into something quite different from the intentions of Valentine. Indeed, it is ironic to think that what the Church tried to achieve so long ago was the preservation of the institution of marriage, in the guise of St Valentine's Day. The reality of Valentine's Day and what is associated with it is quite different; the return of promiscuity to society, relationships built upon and that result in fornication, unwanted pregnancies, back street abortions and all things that lead to the degradation and loss of honour in society.
Sadly, the corruption that ensues from this celebration of immorality affects all levels of society. Far from being a harmless activity, Valentine's Day is big business in Western society. Television and newspapers will publicise Valentine's Day through their promotion of special programmes, articles and events. Department stores, gift shops, the Post Office and clothes shops will be fully decorated with red roses and heart shaped balloons, enticing customers to purchase all that they will need to make their Valentine's Day dreams a reality.
Throughout the country in the month of February countless numbers of schools, universities and clubs are in preparation for balls and parties, inviting the unsuspecting populace. Regrettably, some Muslims will inevitably be amongst them lured into the havens of free mixing, alcohol, drugs, and illicit sexual encounters.
At university students will use 14 February to indulge in all manner of obscene activity. Young men and women will spend the day preparing a repertoire of 'chat up lines', which they will use as a tool for enticing complete strangers in to having 'one night stands' with them. Many may even be competing with each other in the number of people they can seduce in one night so that they can 'kiss and tell' the next day.
In The West - On Valentine's Day Student Unions will be issuing free condoms, college bars will be subsidising exotic cocktails, and drug-pushers will be stocking up on the latest line of 'date rape' pills. This is all part of the package that goes along with the illicit relationships, fornication and adultery that is celebrated around Valentine's Day.
He (saw) also said: “Two categories of people I have not seen them (yet): some people who hold whips like the tails of the cows by which they lash the people. And women who wear (clothes) but (are) half-naked, bending (their bodies) and bending the sight of the men to them. Their heads are like the tilted humps of the camels. These women will not enter the paradise nor will they experience its smell (odour), though its odour is felt at a distance of so and so (days).” [Muslim]
BITTEN BY THE LOVE BUG? No, it's just another STD
The consequences of the activities that many will take up on 14 February and beyond are clear to see. Year after year there is an increase in the number of date rapes that occur in this country. So much so Delhi and Mumbai and Calcutta were named as one of the most dangerous cities for women in India. Recently we saw the open sexual assault on women on the new years day in Mumbai.
The promiscuous activity within society has led to astronomical rises in the diagnoses of acute sexually transmitted diseases (STD).
In 2006 UNAIDS estimated that there were 5.6 million people living with HIV in India, which indicated that there were more people with HIV in India than in any other country in the world. The number of AIDS deaths in India (which was estimated at 2.7 million for the period 1980-2000) is judged to rise to 12.6 million in the period 2000-2015.
According to the latest findings of The Outlook-Synovate exclusive poll among 13-17 year olds - at least one in four has had a sexual experience. An alarming proportion has encountered multiple partners and claiming to indulge in sex at least once a month. At least 25 per cent of those polled claim to have used contraceptives; primarily condoms and pills. And most of those polled; claim to have lost virginity around 11-17 years.
DoctorNDTV.com conducted a survey to find out the perceptions and attitudes towards pre-marital sex in the Indian society. Interestingly, it was found that 88 percent of the people who took the survey felt that pre-marital sex did exist in our society.
Mumbai Counselling clinic claims that The all India occurrence of STDs in the age group of 18 to 30 is as high as 48 to 52 per cent. Premarital sex among 18- to 20-year-olds in metros is as high as 65.6 per cent amongst girls and 63.3 amongst boys.
يا معشر المهاجرين خمس إذا ابتليتم بهن وأعوذ بالله أن تدركوهنلم تظهر الفاحشة في قوم قط حتى يعلنوا بها إلا فشا فيهم الطاعونوالأوجاع التي لم تكن مضت في أسلافهم الذين مضوا ولم ينقصواالمكيال والميزان إلا الشاة بالسنين وشدة المئونة وجور السلطان عليهمولم يمنعوا زكاة أموالهم إلا منعوا القطر من السماء ولولا البهائم لميمطروا ولم ينقضوا عهد الله وعهد رسوله إلا سلط الله عليهم عدوامن غيرهم فأخذوا بعض ما في أيديهم وما لم تحكم أئمتهم بكتابالله ويتخيروا مما أنزل الله إلا جعل الله بأسهم بينهم
Abdullah ibn Umar said, 'The Prophet (saw) came to us and said, 'Oh Muhajireen, you may be afflicted by five things; God forbid that you should live to see them. If fornication should become widespread, you should realise that this has never happened without new diseases befalling the people which their forbears never suffered. If people should begin to cheat in weighing out goods, you should realise that this has never happened without drought and famine befalling the people, and their rulers oppressing them. If people should withhold zakat, you should realise that this has never happened without the rain being stopped from falling; and were it not for the animals' sake, it would never rain again. If people should break their covenant with Allah and His messenger, you should realise that it has never happened without Allah sending an enemy against them to take some of their possessions by force. If the leaders do not govern according to the Book of Allah, you should realise that this has never happened without Allah making them into groups and making them fight one another' [Ibn Majah].
How can the West claim to offer the alternative when its criteria of individual freedom and benefit which by establishing sensual gratification as the paramount concern has led to the misery of millions of people? If we take a quick look at the West’s record we find that in their societies the top five problems in the social and marital life are:
- Mistrust and Adultery - 70% of American wives commit adultery within 5 years of marriage.
- Divorce - one in three end up in divorce.
- Rape - 167 women are raped every day in the UK.
- Wife battery - a battery incident occurs every 18 seconds in the America.
- Child molestation and paedophilia - in Britain a quarter of a million people are known paedophiles!.
THE PATRON SAINT OF SEXUAL FREEDOM
The reality of Valentine's Day reflects a problem that does not end with 14 February. For the same concept, which drives people to stretch the limits of conventional morality on that day, is the same concept that Western society functions on every day of the year - sexual freedom.
The notion of 'sexual freedom' is central to the core values of secularism that the Western world has built as the foundation of its viewpoint in life. By separating religion from life's affairs, all values of morality and self-restraint have been subjugated to the whims and desires of individuals. While freeing people from the oppressive subjugation of the leaders of the 16th Century European Church, secularism has enslaved mankind into an even more disastrous predicament - the relentless pursuit of personal pleasure.
In the name of 'freedom', hundreds of thousands of lives have been lost through wars that have purported to spread it, such as recent the wars in Afghanistan and Iraq. As a result of 'freedom', people throughout the Western world are subjected to an increasing danger and fear of robbery, attack, and rape, by people who have been brought up in the belief that freedom to pursue ones desires is a license to relieve their needs at the expense of innocent bystanders .When the concept of freedom is applied to the relations between men and women, then this 'sexual freedom' inevitably leads to chaos, anarchy and misery in society.
ISLAM REJECTS SEXUAL FREEDOM
In light of the above issues the Muslim Ummah must be vigilant and recognise the mechanisms deployed by the enemies of Islam to reshape our understanding of the Islam. When Muslims are encouraged to engage in St. Valentine's Day they are being asked to discard the Islamic morals, standards of behaviour, respect and dignity that is commanded from men and women.
It is essential for Muslims to realise that Islam demands that the point of reference is exclusively the Ahkham Shari'ah (divine rule). This is the only valid source of the rites, traditions or practices that Muslims are permitted to follow. Islam is in complete opposition to the secular concept of separation of religion from life. Nor does it give any credence to the false notion of individual freedom. Instead, Islam came to completely organise the affairs of humans in all aspects, liberating mankind from subjugation to other people, or their own base desires, and guiding them to the perfect laws of their Creator (swt).
It is reported that Anas Bin Malik (ra) said; "When the Prophet (saw) came to Medina, the people had two holidays from the days of Jahiliyyah. He (saw) said, "When I came to you, you had two holidays you used to celebrate in jahiliyyah. Allah has replaced them for you with better days, the day of Fitr and the day of slaughter (Adha)."
From this basis it is clear that Islam prohibits the celebration of festivals, whether they are Easter, Christmas or Shrove Tuesday. From its origin St. Valentine's Day is a pagan festival that encourages sexual relationships in society and is far away from anything a Muslim could contemplate. Therefore, observing its rituals and anything associated with it is prohibited for the Muslims and is rejected by Islam.
What valentines promote is free mixing and illicit relationships between the sexes. Sex is promoted everywhere. We constantly bombarded with billboards, advertising commercials, magazines, and songs to television programmes.
Through primary, secondary education and beyond, boyfriend-girlfriend relationships are normalised to the extent that it is seen as strange if someone isn’t ‘going out’ with a member of the opposite sex. Sex education in schools promotes this by explaining to the students the various forms of contraception instead of giving them the correct values related to the subject.
The Muslim Ummah must be vigilant and recognise the mechanisms deployed by the enemies of Islam to reshape our understanding of the Islam. When Muslims are encouraged to engage in St. Valentine's Day they are being asked to discard the Islamic morals, standards of behaviour, respect and dignity that is commanded from men and women.It is essential for Muslims to realise that Islam demands that the point of reference is exclusively to the Ahkham Shari'ah (divine rule). This is the only valid source of the rites, traditions or practices that Muslims are permitted to follow.
Realising the magnitude of the Haram actions
A Muslim must link his actions directly to the consequences: the rewards and punishments in the hereafter. He should visualise these even when thinking about performing any prohibited action. This consciousness of Allah (SWT) and the afterlife should be a shield to protect us from sin and should encourage us to earn reward.
Abu Hurairah reported that the Prophet (SAW) said, “When a person commits fornication there goes out of him the Iman (belief) and it hovers like a canopy over his head and when he quits this act the Iman reverts to him again” [Tirmidhi & Abu Dawud].
Ubadah ibn as-Samit narrated that the Prophet (SAW) said, "If you guarantee me six things on your part I shall guarantee you Paradise. Speak the truth when you talk, keep a promise when you make it, when you are trusted with something fulfil your trust, avoid sexual immorality, lower your eyes, and restrain your hands from injustice" [Ahmad and Baihaqi in Shu'ab al-Iman transmitted it].
The Prophet (Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam) said, "The adultery of the eyes is the sight, the adultery of the tongue is the talk, and the inner self wishes, desires and the private parts testify all this or deny it" [Bukhari]
Unlike in the West where it is abnormal for women to step out of their homes without layers of make-up, lipstick and wearing revealing clothes, Islam forbade this for its impact on society is devastating in spreading immorality, like teenage pregnancies, single parents, rape, child abuse etc.
Those who say that they are too young to get married are effectively saying “I am too young to treat a woman (or man) fairly, justly and kindly.” They are effectively professing their lack of determination to commit, to be faithful, fair or just. Some may argue that both people in the relationship just want to have a bit of fun and are not ready to commit, so what’s wrong with that? The reality of that is that people get seriously hurt, abused and exploited.
Staying in the correct atmosphere
Remaining a correct atmosphere is vital for a Muslim to be able to avoid the temptations. The type of atmosphere that exists amongst some of the youth is very corrupt, where the topic of discussion revolves around the opposite sex and ‘showing off’ to each other. This type of atmosphere only serves to agitate the instincts of people and potentially leads them further away from Islam.
Abu Musa narrated that the Prophet (saw) said, "The example of a good companion in comparison with a bad one, is I like that of the musk seller and the blacksmith's bellows (or furnace); from the first you would either buy musk or enjoy its good smell while the bellows would either burn your clothes or your house, or you get a bad nasty smell thereof." [Bukhari Volume 3, No 314]
Relationships In IslamIn Islam the relations between a man and woman are clearly regulated and their interaction is not built upon arousing the sexual instinct or viewing each other as a form of sensual gratification. So anything which will lead to this is stopped. Involvement in or attendance of Western style pubs, club, parties, or any other such social function is completely prohibited to Muslims.Any signs of intimacy and passion are confined to the correct form of relationships between men and women, which is through marriage.Ibn Mas'ud narrates that the Messenger of Allah (saw) said; "Oh you youngsters. Whosoever amongst you can afford to marry should marry, because it will help you to lower his gaze, and guard his modesty (i.e. private parts from unlawful sex). And whosoever is not able to marry he should fast, because it will be protection for him."The implementation of Islam ensures that the society established upon it will be free of promiscuity and will exhibit a high level of moral awareness. The Shari'ah recognises the needs and instincts of both man and woman. The family is protected and strengthened by the prohibition of fornication, adultery, free mixing of the sexes and the regulation of the dress code. By these injunctions, Islam prevents the possibility of its society being plagued by the same sexual ailments as those seen in the West. Such as STD.
وَلَا تَقْرَبُوا الزِّنَا إِنَّهُ كَانَ فَاحِشَةً وَسَاءَ سَبِيلًا
Allah (swt) says 'Nor come nigh to adultery: for it is a shameful (deed) and an evil, opening the road (to other evils)' [TMQ Al-Isra: 32].
Allah (Subhanahu Wa Ta’aala) says, "And let those who find not the financial means for marriage keep themselves chaste, until Allah enriches them of His Bounty" [TMQ An- Nur: 33].
Marriage, Love & Marital life
Islamically, when a relationship begins the man and woman should respect each other and treat each other well. Muslims don’t drink alcohol, they don’t gossip or backbite, they don’t sleep around, go to nightclubs or pubs. Hence, the situations in which unwanted pregnancies are obtained, STDs are spread and young girls are raped and abused are avoided.
Thus, men have loyal, supportive, kind wives who are trustworthy irreplaceable companions. Likewise women have strong, kind, devoted husbands who dedicate themselves to their wives’ comfort and happiness. And on top of that, they love each other.
Marriage is based on companionship in Islam, unlike in Western society where it is based on competition. Companionship is where one finds repose and tranquillity in the other.
They both have responsibilities towards each other.
وَمِنْ آيَاتِهِ أَنْ خَلَقَ لَكُمْ مِنْ أَنفُسِكُمْ أَزْوَاجًا لِتَسْكُنُوا إِلَيْهَا وَجَعَلَ بَيْنَكُمْ مَوَدَّةً وَرَحْمَةً إِنَّ فِي ذَلِكَ لآياتٍ لِقَوْمٍ يَتَفَكَّرُونَ
And among His Signs is this, that He created for you wives from among yourselves, that you may find repose in them (li-taskunoo ilayha), and He has put between you affection and mercy. Verily, in that are indeed signs for a people who reflect.” [TMQ Ar-Rum: 21]